Your ultimate guide to wedding save the date etiquette: when to send them, what to include, who to include and more!
Save the dates are the “pre-invitation” cards that get sent out to do exactly as they say – save your wedding date!
It allows your wedding guests to clear off their calendars, save money if they have to travel, and start making arrangements. It also serves as a physical reminder of your wedding date, so they don’t book other events in the meantime!
When to send your Save the Dates
- 6-8 months before your wedding if it’s local
- 9-12 months before your wedding if it’s a destination wedding, or if a lot of your guests have to travel
The biggest question we get about wedding Save the Date etiquette is when to send them. First of all, no one can really tell you what is right or wrong for your wedding. Especially with Save the Dates. Just because there’s a suggested timeline, doesn’t mean you have to follow it.
Generally, the suggested time to send save the dates is about 6-8 months before your wedding. But we have had some of our couples send them closer to 9-10 months out, which I think is completely fine.
If you send them out before that, you might run a higher risk of people losing track of the save the date. If it feels so far away, they might think “i’ll get to it later.” Whether it’s putting it on the fridge or in their calendar. And then, you know how that goes.
If you are having a destination wedding, or you know a lot of your guests will be traveling to your wedding, 9-12 months is more standard to give them some time to plan. If your wedding is on a holiday weekend, you might also consider this 9-12 month timeline since those dates tend to book up sooner in peoples’ calendars.
What to include on your Save the Dates:
Definitely include YOUR DATE! I have heard of some funny (maybe not so funny to the couple at the time) stories where someone forgets to include the date, or the location of the wedding. Although we would probably agree that the date is most important.
At a minimum, you’ll want to include:
- Your names
- Your wedding date
- The location of your wedding (just city and state is fine)
- The words “Save the Date” (or something similar), so it’s clear what this is!
If you have a wedding website, you could include that as well, so your extra enthusiastic guests can catch updates on there.
Sometimes people include a line that says “formal invitation to follow.” Although I don’t think that is a requirement, as most people assume there will be an invitation to follow. But you can include it if you’re worried about your less-experienced wedding guests thinking it is the invitation.
Wedding Save the Date Etiquette
Now, this may seem like an obvious point, but if someone receives a Save the Date from you, they will be expecting an invitation. So make sure you are absolutely sure you want to invite them before you send them a save the date.
To hopefully clear up some confusion early on, I would include exactly who is invited on the envelope of the save the date. Address it with the names of those invited. Don’t say “Smith Family” if you intend to only invite the parents, and not the kids. Then, you’ll of course do this again on your invitations.
Best kinds of Save the Date cards
Your most common Save the Date is postcard-like. One card on thick paper – sometimes double sided, sometimes not. I personally love magnet Save the Dates because they are super easy for me to throw on my fridge (I love putting our own couples’ save the dates on the fridge – especially because they usually use their engagement photos!). Of course, those will be more expensive to buy and possibly to mail than a regular card.
The e-invite is becoming a little more popular, but I will always encourage hard copy save the dates and invites. There’s just a little too much that can go wrong with an email (or confusion that will inevitably ensue with some guests). If you want people to actually remember your date, a hard copy is best.
If you do go the electronic route, I would include something as unique as a calendar invite if you can, so at least it’s an easy click for guests to add it to their calendar.
Remember – the simpler you can make it for your guests, the better. This reminds me a lot of what I learn in marketing when working on my businesses. People need to be told exactly what to do and how to do it (and sometimes when), so the easier the better. It’s called a call to action. Think of making a clear and easy call to action for your guests.
Show off your personality!
I think Save the Dates are a lot of fun because you can use them to show off your personality a bit more. Of course you can do that with your invitations, but generally the save the dates are less formal. A LOT of our couples choose to use their engagement photos on their save the dates. You could also opt for a fun design or doodle (maybe even something you doodle yourself?). Or try out a color scheme and style that you are considering using for your wedding, but aren’t ready to commit to yet.
Do you have more questions about wedding invitations and save the dates? Leave a comment below or contact me here! I love connecting with wedding couples!
Did you know you can order a free sample of wedding invitations and save the dates from Minted? It’s a great way to get a feel for the type of paper, colors and style you like best!
